happiness

so, i just read that a recent study at columbia found that people who were given fewer choices were happier than people who had a large amount of choices. sometimes i think that if i had less options, i'd be happier with my reality and just pursue what there was to do, instead of questioning if i had made the right choice.

right now, i'm witnessing the hatching of spring...and the multitude of choices that come with it. should i continue to farm the piece of land i worked last year? shall i put my energy into developing the community garden group i'm chairing since the local foods conference weekend? should i pursue the greenhouse project pilot that i'm working on for developmentally disabled adults, or should i create my own educational site for the broader community? should i respond to the email i got from the ex-pats in thailand who want me to help them start a farm project there? should i spend my free time training for a triathlon, or learning guitar? do i focus on getting a dog or a girlfriend?

its all a little overwhelming, and in the midst of the whelm, it's hard to find my radiance. (i'm a giant beam of light! i AM a giant beam of light! i am i am i am). it's hard to hear my voice...it's hard to see my path. i want to opt out into the void. i want to have no choice.

but the thing is, as i read further into the columbia study, i learned that the subjects were faced with the choice of picking a chocolate. one group (the happier one, so it seems) only had to choose a chocolate from six varieties, where as the other (unhappy) group had to choose one from twenty four possibilities.

oh, how we suffer. we have to eat a chocolate, and it may not have been the very best one. we'll never know.

but hell, we're eating chocolate.

if i think about it, i can be happy for just knowing that chocolate exists. and on the same line, i can be happy that i have so many fabulous things in my life to choose to pursue. there is no right choice, now, is there? it's all beautiful, and it all contributes to my life and the life of everything around me. what more is there to be happy about?